Александр Габриэль

Комедия

Всё закончилось. Се ля ви…
Есть твоё, есть моё. Нет нашего.
Всепогодный костюм любви
будет кто-то другой разнашивать.
Все свои – за грядой кулис.
Против Крамеров – только Крамеры.
Словно выкачан воздух из
нам назначенной барокамеры.
Одиночество. Ночь без сна
бьёт по темени, словно палица.
Память прежде была нужна.
Ну, а нынче нужней беспамятство.
Под ногами дрожит земля;
спят игрушки и спит масс-медиа…

Вот такая финита ля
человеческая комедия.

Зимний разлад

Мы словно бузотёры в старших классах:
кривились рты в презрительных гримасах,
хоть что делить — никто не ведал сам.
Два мнения, два вопиющих гласа
чадили, словно жжёная пластмасса,
взлетая к равнодушным небесам.

Была зима. Казался воздух ломким,
а каждый шёпот — безобразно громким,
как грубый скрип несмазанной арбы.
Не видимый банальной фотосъёмке,
нам в спины бил змеиный хвост позёмки,
вздымаясь, словно кобра, на дыбы.

Блуждая между трёх дремучих сосен,
мы спорили. И каждый был несносен,
стреляя всякий раз до счёта «три»…
Был хор фальшив, хоть не многоголосен,
и было в целом свете минус восемь,
не больше. И снаружи, и внутри.

Всё было так нескладно и нелепо…
Любовь крошилась, как кусочки хлеба,
а ветер острой крошкой лица сёк…
И, раненые влёт шрапнелью снега,
мы мяли в омертвевших пальцах небо,
как школьник — пластилиновый брусок.

В границах заколдованного круга,
где не было ни севера, ни юга,
звенело: «Я так больше не могу…»
И наши тени, вскормленные вьюгой,
всё дальше расходились друг от друга
на жёстком хирургическом снегу.

Схватка

Вот двое на шашках отчаянно рубятся,
не помня манер, секундантов и лоска;
Могучие, как персоналии Рубенса,
безумные, как вакханалии Босха.
И нет кислорода в аду этом дантовом,
в охоте поставить последнюю точку.
Зачем это нужно, скажите, атланты, вам —
небесную массу держать в одиночку?
Глянь: молнии в небе сверкают рассерженно
и громы берут запредельную ноту…
А небо ничем и никем не поддержано,
и вы позабыли про вашу работу.
И что, коль случайно сошлись ваши тропы? Ведь
не нравится встреча — скорей разойдитесь…
Но двое забыли Нагорную проповедь
и звание «рыцарь», и звание «витязь».
Ничто, кроме схватки, отныне не важно вам,
танцуют на небе гигантские тени…
И даже зеваки, сторонники каждого,
друг с другом схлестнулись в боях нешутейных.
Слепящая ненависть в воздухе кружится,
бактерии смерти, как саженцы, сея…

И плачет Любовь от тоски и от ужаса,
не нужная больше.
Забытая всеми.

***

Было время глупейших ошибок и вечной любви,
и мозаика жизни казалась подвижной, как ртуть.
Ночь стояла в окне, как скупой на слова визави,
и надежда, живущая в пульсе, мешала уснуть.
На промашках своих никогда ничему не учась,
я не спас утопавших, а также гонимых не спас…
Так и сталь закалялась, и так познавалась матчасть,
убавляя незрелой романтики хрупкий запас.
Это было смешно: я играл в саркастичный прикид
в мире радостных флагов и детских реакций Пирке.
Я был словно учитель из старой «Республики ШКИД»,
кто хотел говорить с гопотой на ее языке.
Опыт крохотный свой не успев зарубить на носу,
на дорогах своих не найдя путеводную нить,
я всё слушал, как «лапы у елей дрожат на весу»
и мечтал научиться с любимою так говорить.
Всё прошло и пройдёт: звуки плохо настроенных лир,
ожиданье чудес да июльский удушливый зной…
Репетиции нет. Есть прямой беспощадный эфир.
То, что было со мной — то уже не случится со мной.

***

Ни зги, ни зги. Четвертый час утра.
Ночь напоследок выверяет гранки.
А в комнате — пришедший из вчера
невыветренный запах валерьянки.
Тьма бьётся в окна, словно в волнорез,
и отступает с деланным испугом.
И стены, словно Пушкин и Дантес,
неторопливо сходятся друг с другом.
Спит кошка у окна. И видит Бог —
всеведущ, всепрощающ, всепогоден, —
как дышащий покоем черный бок
той темноте за окнами угоден.
И ты бы так, и ты бы так хотел:
спокойно спать сумняшеся ничтоже,
не прозревая горестный предел,
случайный, как пупырышки по коже.
Но всё светлей оконных рам лорнет
по логике вращения земного…
Ещё чуть-чуть — и ночь сойдёт на «нет»,
как безвозвратно сказанное слово.

Cнег

Снег идёт и идёт. Ни запрета ему, ни этики.
Снег идёт и идёт, возведённый в квадрат и в куб.
У зимы на лице — ни малейших следов косметики,
лишь нетающий иней на тоненькой нитке губ.
С ней сражаться — как в гору, на пик колесо везти:
колесо ускользнёт. Вновь начнёшь, как Сизиф, в низах…
Снег идёт и идёт. Ни стыда у него, ни совести.
Да от белого, вечного белого — резь в глазах.
Мы мечтою о лете с тобою навек обмануты.
Лета больше не будет. И лучше о нём забудь.
А пока — в ледники вплоть до бивней врастают мамонты,
и в термометрах — там, за окном — замерзает ртуть.
В небесах — ни вечерней звезды нет, ни солнца рыжего.
Снег идёт и идёт. Нагло лезет в дверной проём…
Снег идёт и идёт. Но мы выживем. Точно выживем,
только надо быть ближе.
Ближе.
Совсем вдвоём.

когда уходят

когда от тебя когда от тебя уходят
и счастье твое уносит порывом ветра
и солнечные гектары твоих угодий
сжимаются вмиг в квадратные миллиметры

когда никаких улыбок и обретений
ни в жизни ни на фейсбуке ни на ютюбе
под дерганый ритм танцуют в камине тени
как будто открытый нерв в нездоровом зубе

когда горизонта линия накренилась
когда косяком на запад ушли восходы
когда словно волга в каспий ты впал в немилость
у броского мира вечно живой природы
отнюдь ты не стал ни гением ни прохвостом
не сделался враз героем да иноверцем
лишь только совсем немного но меньше ростом
а также совсем немного но больше сердцем

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